fuckingrecipes:

itsmisspickle:

dailytweets:

Amazon Link: https://amzn.to/2twJSuu

Looks like millennials kill an industry before it even got off the ground😂

• Pushpop containers on amazon
• A bottle or two of cheap alcohol of your choice at your local liquor store.
• However much you want to spend on frozen fruit, juice, and yogurt
• Alcohol takes longer to freeze than water, but most home freezers can get down to around 15-20 degrees F, which is where you want to aim. 
• Fill just over half your blender with frozen fruit
• Slop some yogurt on top, idk like a half cup?
• Pour wine into the blender until the ‘fill’ line is about a quarter-up. 
• BLEND THAT MOTHERFUCKER LIKE IT INSULTED YOUR GRANDMA. 

• You want the texture to be pretty thick (thicc), because a thick smoothie will usually harden beautifully in the freezer – forms a nice solid popcicle.

• If its too thin, add more fruit.
• Make some cheesecake or chocolate pudding and toss some of that in there instead of yogurt if you’re feeling flavorful. 
• Pour your new slurry of goodness into your popcicle molds
• If there’s empty molds, repeat above steps for more delicious sludge. Maybe switch flavors?
• Stuff into the freezer. Make sure freezer is set to ‘really freaking cold’ (alcohol freezes at a lower temp than water) 
• Wait a day or two. 
• (Eat the leftover smoothie) 
• VICTORY

If you’re not into alcohol, just replace the alcohol with a red or white juice and you’re good to go. I don’t recommend citrus fruits/juice because they can interact badly with dairy. You can leave out the yogurt and replace with half a banana or avocado if you REALLY want to use citrus and want to keep the smoothness. 

You can also google delicious fruit smoothie recipes for ideas on fruit combinations. 

You can also just use chocolate ice cream and coffee with bailey’s and kaluhua to make a fantastic chocolate popcicle. 

Wine is only 11.5%–13.5% alcohol, so splashing a bit of vodka or rum (usually around 40% alcohol) can EASILY get the mix to have ‘more alcohol than a glass of wine)

The product they’re selling is 99$ for 8 pops. So, 12$ per pop. Plus shipping, and that ramps it up to $16.87 a pop. 

With $135 I can buy:

A single-serve blender – 20$ 
4 lbs of frozen strawberries – 9$ 
12 lbs fresh bananas – 6$ (Bananas are usually ~50 cents a lb at local grocer) 
3 lbs of frozen mango – 9$ 
1 lb of frozen pineapple – $8

Two bottles of Captain Morgan – 30$ 

3 liters of Moscato – 23$ 

Pack of 24 pushpops – 12$

5 cups of yogurt – 9$

A box of cheesecake jello-o pudding mix – $1.50

Gallon of milk – $2

And get one hell of a party
Even before adding the wine and yogurt and cheesecake pudding, that’s 20 lbs of food. 

autumnherah:

blah blah blah I was sad that so many store bought spice mixes featured gross things in them like ungodly amounts of processed sugars and unnecessary preservatives so I went out to find homemade spice mix recipes and these are now all staples in my diet. Why am I sharing them with you? No idea, but I am gonnnnnnna.

Buffalo Spice Mix

ingredients 

• 2 tsp chili powder
• 4 ½ tsp paprika
• 2 ¼ tsp cayenne pepper
• 3 ¼ tbsp garlic powder
• 3 tsp mustard powder
• ½ tsp salt
• 1 tsp ground pepper
• 4 tsp onion powder

directions

1. combine all the spices in a mixing bowl and lightly whisk together.
2. store in an airtight container like a mason jar

how to use

• I generally mix a tablespoon or two per pound of meat (depending on how spicy you want this)
• it also makes an AMAZING seasoning for homemade fries

Ranch Seasoning

ingredients

• 2 tsp salt
• 4 tbsp parsley
• 3 tsp dill weed
• 2 tsp dried chives
• 4 tsp garlic powder
• 4 tsp onion powder
• 4 tsp dried onion flakes
• 2 tsp black pepper

directions

1. combine all the spices in a mixing bowl and lightly whisk together.
2. store in an airtight container like a mason jar

how to use

• about two tablespoons of this mixture = one packet of store bought ranch mix
• add it to a mayonnaise of your choosing to make a DIY ranch dressing
• I like to make air fryer hot wings with buffalo sauce and then toss the wings in this seasoning for a really lovely flavor
• sprinkle it on everything, ranch tastes so good on everything, literally just add this to everything and make it ranch dressing flavored

Taco Seasoning

spoiler alert – this is a copy cat Taco Bell taco seasoning mix

ingredients

• 1 tablespoon chili powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• ½ teaspoon dried minced onion
• ½ teaspoon paprika
• ¼ teaspoon onion powder
• dash garlic powder

directions

1. combine all the spices in a mixing bowl and lightly whisk together.
2. store in an airtight container like a mason jar

how to use

• add one tablespoon of spice mix for every one pound of taco meat you use. Use your hands to thoroughly mix the tablespoon of spice mix into the ground beef. Add the seasoned beef mixture and ½ cup of water in a skillet over medium heat. 
• also very good on homemade french fries

Baharat Middle Eastern Blend

ingredients

• 2 tsp smoky paprika
• 2 tsp cumin
• 1 tsp black pepper
• 1 tsp coriander
• ½ tsp nutmeg
• ½ tsp cinnamon
• ¼ tsp cardamom
• ¼ tsp cloves

directions

1. combine all the spices in a mixing bowl and lightly whisk together.
2. store in an airtight container like a mason jar

how to use

• that is a good question. I am very recently branching out my spice pallet and trying on some new things. So far I have used this as a dry rub for chicken which has been phenomenal.
• one tablespoon per one pound of ground beef for grilled smoky, spicy burgers

Everything Bagel Seasoning

listen, not all of us live near Trader Joe’s

ingredients

• ¼ cup sesame seeds
• ¼ cup poppy seeds
• 3 tablespoons dried onion flakes
• 3 tablespoons dried garlic flakes
• 2 tablespoons coarse sea salt

directions

1. combine all the spices in a mixing bowl and lightly whisk together.
2. store in an airtight container like a mason jar

how to use

• on top of homemade breads
• added to breads with cream cheese
• on top of your eggs
• mixed into burgers
• on top of avocado toast
• basically anywhere you would normally use salt give that food an upgrade and use everything bagel mix instead

angelycdevil:

welcomedmachine:

itskatebishops:

thelittleblackfox:

thesnadger:

actualheroofferelden:

– you just had a brilliant idea. it’s 3am
– bonus: you have something important the next day
– “wow I wrote so much, let’s see the word counter” 350 words “LIES”
– when your worst work gets the most attention
– “[AO3] You’ve got kudos!” emails are your lifeblood, water your crops, and clear your skin
– B L A N K P A G E S O F D O O M
– playing the entire story out in your head. never writing it
– watching or reading anything ever and imagining an au
– making playlists to write to. never writing
– getting an “[AO3] Comment on ______” email and doing the thing. you know the one
– headcanons. so many headcanons
– spending days or weeks on a piece
– watching the hit count rise and the kudos count stay on said work
– when will the kudos return from war

– You have a great idea for a new fic. You have seven half finished fics already.

– Your story idea is no longer relevant/appealing because of things that happened in canon.

– You have a great idea for a story and no idea how it should end

– You have a great idea for a story and know exactly how it should end and how it should begin and in the middle is a vast wasteland of ????????

– Trying to figure out an appropriately literary way to say “and then they do that thing, you know, that thing they do on the show where they make that face and it’s just adorable?”

– Worrying your headcanons reveal way too much about your deep dark secrets as a person.

– Writing down a headcanon that DEFINITELY reveals too much about your deep dark secrets as a person and editing it to make it seem a little more subdued.

– Having to decide between what you want for your faves and their happiness and what’s actually in character.

– Being stuck on an idea for 9000 years and then taking a shower and figuring it out instantly.

– Seriously what is it with being in the shower did you make a deal with one of the fae where you’re only a good writer while you’re naked??

– “What are you writing?” “Oh, you know…just…a thing….”

– What the hell you can just copy/paste formatted work on Ao3 you don’t have to put the html in yourself WHY DID NO ONE TELL YOU THIS, WHY DID IT TAKE SO LONG TO FIGURE OUT?

– Wanting to tell your non-fandom friends about your story ideas, but they can’t understand a word you’re saying.

– Wanting to tell your fandom friends about your story ideas, but they’re all reading your fics and you don’t want to give them spoilers.

– when the plot decides to do is own damn thing and suddenly you have to add three more chapters to accommodate it all and fuck it all, this was supposed to be a one-shot

– spiralling down wikipedia hole in the name of research

– what’s that word? The one that means, you know, the thing?

– When someone reads your back catalogue and leaves a nice comment on Every Single One

– not being able to hit a 2k word essay, but churning out a 10k word fic the same night

-there is a very specific AU in your drafts. No one wants this AU. YOU don’t want this AU. But you keep going back to it, working on it, swearing you’re never ever posting it

-you know that you’re lying and will eventually inflict it on people in hopes of validation anyway

– writing pages and pages of “fic” in group chats and having zero motivation to write out of the fic idea when you open up a word doc

sirhate:

lily-peet:

Bad idea for a Romantic Comedy
The Chief of Police is married to a Mob Boss, and they have to keep “just failing” to catch each other. When one of them hits the other in a shootout, it’s followed with “Oh I’m never going to hear the end of this…”

“So how was your day at work?”
“YOU FUCKING SHOT ME! THAT WAS MY DAY AT WORK!”

We clearly have different definitions of bad.

inkskinned:

me: i’m just gonna devote today to writing. really just knuckle down and get a lot of writing done just write up a funky little storm of writing

me: