Category: Uncategorized

muchadoaboutmusicals:

cinder-ember:

During a high school production of Beauty and the Beast, where I was
assistant costumer and assistant prop master, our director decided that
we needed to spice up Gaston’s introduction. You know: in the movie,
when Lefou runs in trying to catch the duck/goose that Gaston has just
shot out of the sky?

Originally, the actors were going to stroll
on stage with our Lefou hauling in the really neat (and real!)
taxidermied deer head that we had found in a local thrift store. Now,
two days before opening night, our director wants Lefou to run in from
off stage and catch a stuffed duck that Gaston has just shot. This, of
course, requires two things to work properly as a scene: a gunshot
noise, and a stuffed duck.

The gunshot noise, we had covered.
Blue-collar, redneck school? Guns a plenty to record. The stuffed duck?
Harder than you might have thought to obtain.

Three hunting
stores, two taxidermists, and one Pet Supply Store ™, I’d finally found a
semi-realistic pheasant squeaky toy. What follows is an account of the
ways this dog toy managed to be the nightmare prop of the six show run.

Opening
Night: The stagehand, who was supposed to drop the bird from the
ceiling catwalk, missed his cue and didn’t drop the it. Lefou’s actor
rolls with it and does an excellent job of looking around foolishly
before getting cuffed upside the head by Gaston. The stagehand then
drops the bird squarely on Gaston’s head. Cue laughter.

Saturday
Matinee: Different stagehand throws the bird instead of dropping it and
beans Lefou directly in the face with the prop. Lefou falls over. Cue
laughter.

Saturday Night: Bird is missing during curtain call.
Director hauls the deer head down from it’s place on the tavern wall and
tells Gaston and Lefou to revert to the old blocking i.e. no gunshot,
no bird, just walk in with trophy. During Gaston and Lefou’s
conversation, gun shot sound goes off and a stagehand throws the bird
onto the stage…from the wrong side of the stage. Lefou and Gaston stare
at it in awkward silence for a solid thirty seconds before Lefou makes
off-script, subtle joke about Gaston’s gun going off late instead of
early. Cue adults in the audience laughing.

Sunday Matinee:
Director begs the stagehands to get the cue right at least once. Gunshot
and bird prop go off without a hitch. Lefou accidentally catches the
prop when it falls from the catwalk. He’s so startled that he caught it
that Gaston runs right in to him. They drop both the gun and the bird
props, and grab the wrong prop in their scramble. Gaston spends the rest
of the scene gesturing dramatically with a stuffed pheasant, instead of
a gun.

Sunday Night:

Director is fed up with bird prop, decides that Lefou should just carry
bird prop in after gunshot happens off stage. Lefou accidentally
squeezes the prop during the intro conversation, startling both actors
into silence with the squeaky toy noise – apparently, neither of them
realized it was a dog toy.

Monday Elementary School Show: Lefou walks on stage with the
bird. Accidentally drops the prop during conversation with Gaston.
Gaston doesn’t notice the dropped prop and steps on it. Cue depressingly
sad squeaky toy noise. Cue ten years olds laughing.

Modern Magic AUs

auideas:

  • “Our familiars seem really into each other huh you wanna go grab a coffee?”
  • “We’re in the same practice space and you are terrible at magic and you keep hurling stuff at my face STOP IT.”
  • “We are neighbors and you are terrible at magic and keep making noise and hurling stuff at my house/apartment walls STOP IT.”
  • “I do magic tattoos and you want something illegal. Like really illegal.”
  • “You’re a street artist who uses magic in their art and I see your work everyday on my commute.”
  • “You drag me to an underground meeting of mages plotting to overthrow non-mages. Little do you know I’m a non-mage.”
  • “You drag me to an underground meeting of non-mages plotting to overthrow mages. Little do you know I’m a mage.”
  • “I’m in the science camp of mages who believe that everything can be boiled down to equations and formulas. You’re in the natural camp of mages who believe that magic comes from feeling, spirituality, passion, and other non-quantifiables. Something happens that prove us both wrong in some way.”
  • “My regular dealer of spell ingredients got raided the other day. Now I need a new source.”
  • “I have some disorder that makes magic emerge from me differently than others. Or at least, the doctors call it a disorder.”
  • “Wow, who cursed me in Klingon, can’t be that nerdy kid next door who bragged to me about his working phaser last year.“ *side-eye*
  • “My magical cosplay is better than your magical cosplay.”
  • “I’m the first non-mage in my family in generations and nobody understand how or why and it’s really awkward.”
  • “So this spell went wrong and my body disappeared into the aether and I’m now a disembodied voice please help.”
  • “So I summoned a demon, but it never appeared. Clearly didn’t work. So why are my dishes washed and my clothes put away and my doors opening when I’m about to walk through them?”
  • “I made a golem to mind my kid while I’m at work, but I think it’s doing more than I’m expecting. Do golems throw raves?”
  • “I’m a burglar who uses magic to do what I do, but then I try to break into your house and find out you’re a way more powerful mage than I am and I am screwed. Or am I?”
  • “Note to self: do not try to con a former mage-master.”

theballadofbilbobaggins: sorry if there are too many

admin °m°: No worries! This is a wonderful list that I’m sure the followers will love. Please feel free to send more things like this in at any time!

braceletnumbertwo:

joltick:

andrewsadrian:

i just saw an ad that was probably supposed to say accident lawyers but it said accidental lawyers and i can’t sotp laughing “just got my law degree aw man this wasn’t what i meant to do how am i gonna get out of this one”

i love this post because my dad literally got his law degree by accident?? he was the first person in his family to go to college and he didn’t understand how majors worked (he thought that it was just like.. if you take a lot of math classes you’re a math major and that it was just a figure of speech) so when it was time for him to declare his he realized he hadn’t actually been working towards any major in particular.

so he went through and looked at the required classes for every major offered at his college to see if the classes he had taken matched with anything, and lo and behold he found a pre-law degree.  and he thought, “well ok, i guess being a lawyer doesn’t sound too bad.”  and that’s how my dad became a lawyer.

is your dad phoenix wright